Monday, November 26, 2018

The great Diva OF Huge mamas of the cuban Revolution


   I do not know if you remember the great star or diva that occupied the spaces of the TV, the newspapers and filled with almost sensual praises the speeches of Fidel Castro back in the eighties.
  It was nothing more and less than a simple cow. But yes. A cow that beat all the records of daily milk production in three milkings a day, which were zealously quantified by Castro's flattering veterinarians.
   Ubre Blanca, that's what it was called, was the center of Castro's experiments with the crossbreeding of Holstein cattle a Canadian stallion and a Cebu mulatto creole until they got the big cow, other experiments would come later to get dwarf cows as little dogs that went to have in each house the Cubans.
  There was no cheese, no yoghurts or other dairy products in stores. But Ubre Blanca was the superstar worshiped and repeated every day by the revolutionary media. The people said in a low voice that she was the first lady to pose in front of the cameras as the horse's wife -Fidel Castro- and that from the first milking he stuck to an udder of the bovine to give himself strength in his unsettling seven-hour speeches before the village.
  Fidel Castro spoke on the phone with the famous designer Georgio Armani to design beautiful dresses for the first lady, I say, cow, and to be photographed both on the cover of Vogue magazine. Although he offered a million dollars the famous couturier did not dare to make dresses with opening for the glorious udder and the butt to make their needs. Fidel, disappointed, settled for posing for the magazine Bohemia, which was the only one worth reading for the cartoons that were placed in the last pages.
  They say that they put headphones to her with classical music - she loved Mozart - and an air conditioned atmosphere but she had bad character, the fame was going to her to the head and she began with MUUU very intense and distorted.
   It produced so much milk that it was going to feed a town the size of Guanabacoa. And Castro proud of his cow. He did not give credit to scientists, biologists or veterinarians who did not dare to contradict him in his constant experiments as a hallucinatory tyrant.
  First came to Ubre Blanca unusual cataleptic movements and meowing like an out of tune soprano. They were the first symptoms of the cow that later appeared in the United Kingdom as the mad cow syndrome.
   Until one day the poor cow was born a tumor: Cancer. But Fidel would say the last word: that they keep part of the cow to clone it in the future-Geneticist expert-
   They even embalmed her after her death and made her flatterers, a marble statue of the deceased Diva that monopolized, as queen of the Jet Set, the newspapers and magazines of Cuba.
   No one wept over the dead cow and Fidel went on to another of his experiments.
  Fortunately, at that time the butter was imported from Communist Germany, which already knew by the West the harmful effect on cholesterol and lipids.
   Then it was the turn of Castro's other follies but this would be too long as the reign of the dictator's 60 years.

                               Orlando Vicente Álvarez



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